Conestoga Announces Plan to Transition to a Culinary College

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(Photo Credit: Carmen Groleau/CBC)

Since the federal government will start cracking down on the number of international students allowed into the country, Kitchener’s Conestoga College has announced a new scheme to try to retain all of their golden geese. College president John Tibbits announced in a press conference on Wednesday the college’s plan to transition into a culinary college, “We were practically a cooking school already as most of our students work full-time in the food business. We have the culinary assets.” When asked how life on campus would change for the average student Tibbits said, “For a long time now we have offered year long classes about how to handle knives and how to cut different kinds of vegetables, so most students won’t even notice the change.”

The college, located near Taco Bell, has come under scrutiny recently as they increased the number of international students by 1600% in 9 years and because Tibbits called another college president a whore.

When asked what new names they were considering for the school Tibbits replied, “I personally like Conestoga Curry College because we would only have to add one word to the sign out front, but we are also considering Indian Culinary College, Indian Conestoga College and Conestoga Curry Culinary College.”

The college is also hoping to siphon some of the lunch money from students who have been eating at Taco Bell, by opening more restaurants and having their skilled worker students work at the restaurants. Shortly after the announcement a line of approximately 30,000 students formed outside the Doon Campus building.

 

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